Whispering Hope
Soft as the voice of an angel
Breathing a lesson unheard;
Hope with a gentle persuasion
Whispers her comforting word.
-Alice Hawthorn, "Whispering Hope"
-Alice Hawthorn, "Whispering Hope"
My mom’s mother, Grandma Sally lived with us from time to time when I was growing up. Grandma liked to play the piano and certain pieces still always remind me of her: “Clair de Lune” for one and “Deep Purple.” She also liked to play hymns. I thought she had a funny rolling way of playing chords, but maybe it was her Parkinson’s that added that little flourish.
Today I read the title of a very old song, “Whispering Hope” and the melody came back to me as though it was just last year instead of last century since I’d heard it! I can still hear Grandma playing those tremolo chords and singing along in her tremolo voice.
Grandma Sally has been showing up in my thoughts a lot lately. I wonder if she’s hanging around, sending encouragement. And why now, 30 years after her death? Maybe she’s whispering some hope to me.
Do you ever get the sense that a lost loved one is present? What meaning does that have for you?
posted by Dee Bailey @ 9:26 PM
3 comments
3 Comments:
you asked how the anniversary day was. it was strange, sort of. my sister and law and i talked about how we felt like we were in what we call a "grace bubble." she said hers "leaked" on saturday, but we were amazed at the peace. we both know there will still be hard days and there have been this week.
yesterday i lost my journal, with my purse....the one i have been doing all my "processing" with since august when i started going to the counsellor. the loss of that journal is what i cried over. the other stuff i could be without. i felt like what was in that journal was the only part of me i really had a record of. the rest of me seems lost, but my dear friend pointed out to me that what was in the journal was the "old me" and the new me is not there. I have chosen to believe that losing it is going to be a good thing and that leaving that behind literally is going to keep moving me onward. it still grieves me when i think about it, but i do see little signs of "me" coming through ... little glimpses here and there. thankfully, part of my processing was sharing what i wrote with friends, so much of the more immportant pieces are one my computer which is backed up.
i enjoy your blog. it is only recently that i have "felt" gordon be present. i liked the few times i have felt that. carol
Carol,
Not long ago, a healer gave me a rose quartz that I took on retreat. When I lost it, the consensus was that I no longer need it. The same might be true about your journal; it has served its purpose.
Treasure those moments when you sense the presence of loved ones, whether or not they have died.
Dee
I read the comment about the journal with my own similar story rolling thru my head. I left a journal on a plane when I was traveling back to Fla to be with my mother who was ill. I had been doing that for a few months and had kept notes there of things I wanted to remember my mother for, things I thought I would want to say in her eulogy. When I "lost" it, I just trusted that 1) I was supposed to let go of what was in there and 2) I would remember what was important, 3) I needed to create a new perspective and to do that I had to "make room" with my thoughts and memories.
It is 6 weeks now since my mother passed. The addrenalin of her funeral, then a memorial gathering in a different place, the particles of legal things....now I am left with the ache of loss. At first I was so relieved that she didin't have to suffer anymore; there was peace. Now I cry for me; the aloneness, the never again experiences...I know it is part of the process--and it is still hard to engage in life.
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